Daily Telegraph

Councils and parking

Councils and parking

Going to the beach is one of our great egalitarian past-times. Except it’s not. Nowadays, you have to cough up $8 for the privilege of ...

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He’s a Good Boy

He’s a Good Boy

There seem to be a lot of good boys doing very bad things. Take the teenagers who allegedly led police on a high-speed chase ...

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Tony and Julia in a sandpit.

Tony and Julia in a sandpit.

It’s time to end the blame game over asylum seeker policy. Lives are at stake here, people. Reading the series of letters exchanged between the ...

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Women are their own worst enemies

Women are their own worst enemies

Next week, New Idea will feature a half-naked George Colambaris on the cover. “I want to be a role model for all the short ...

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Texting while Driving

Texting while Driving

It was a performance worthy of a Guinness World Record. Barreling along Sydney Road Fairlight, the truck driver was texting on one mobile phone ...

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The Ugly Aussie

The Ugly Aussie

The ugly Aussie is alive and well and holidaying in South East Asia. Right now he or she is probably bashing someone, taking drugs, ...

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Ah, the holidays

Ah, the holidays

Ah, the holidays. How good is it to relax on the couch to watch the cricket and – hang on, my phone’s beeping. Gee, I’d ...

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The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

The principal of a pre-school in Sydney’s west is the Grinch who stole Christmas. Imagine the confusion on the faces of the three-year-olds at ...

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Video Games

Video Games

‘Pathological internet misuse’ can be summed up in two words: Lazy parenting. It’s been reported international experts are considering labelling video game addiction as ...

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They’re Not Like Us

They’re Not Like Us

The call came in the dead of night. It was from a second cousin twice removed. “You’ve got to help,” he pleaded. “My neighbour knows someone ...

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Victims and villains: The Bali drug boy

Victims and villains: The Bali drug boy

“In the old days, villains had moustaches and kicked the dog. Audiences are smarter these days. They want an ordinary human beings with ...

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Why it’s easier to worship the flying spaghetti monster

Why it’s easier to worship the flying spaghetti monster

The year is 2011 C.E. (Common Era, for the politically correct). The place: A cute little café at the crossroads of heaven, paradise and ...

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Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

Schools will no longer call for canteen volunteers because it discriminates against working mums. Reading groups will be cancelled for fear of offending parents ...

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The Very Hungry Caterpillar

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

A caterpillar has metamorphosed into a pin-up for the diet police. In the classic children’s book, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, he binges on one ...

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Get Fracked

Get Fracked

Seam stimulation sounds like something from a pornographic film. But it’s the new term for fracking being used by the coal seam gas industry. You ...

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Down Down, Profits are Down

Down Down, Profits are Down

Forget about the 3 Rs. In schools these days it’s all about the 3Cs: Consumerism, Capitalism, and Coles. Store managers are giving prizes to Sydney ...

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Dancing on someone’s grave

Dancing on someone’s grave

I’m struggling to find the right expletives to describe the trolls who defaced the facebook tribute page of Ayen Chol. It goes beyond dancing ...

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The ism conspiracy

The ism conspiracy

It’s always comforting to have your suspicions confirmed. Christine Nixon lost her job because she’s fat. Not because she abandoned her post during one of ...

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Death threats are the new black

Death threats are the new black

A parking inspector gave me a ticket the other day so I wrote him a letter: “I hope you die in a ditch, ...

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Kids in hot cars

Kids in hot cars

It was one of those days when you could see the heat shimmering off the pavement. Already 27 degrees at 10 o’clock. In the middle ...

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