Six-year-old Naomi wants to kill herself after being repeatedly sexually abused since the age of two.

Six-year-old Naomi wants to kill herself after being repeatedly sexually abused since the age of two.

Her mother Debbie says the bright and bubbly toddler has become a violent and aggressive girl who wants to throw herself in front of a car to end her suffering.

Last week, I interviewed Debbie on Radio 2UE.

It was harrowing. Heartbreaking.

But instead of expressing sympathy, talkback callers were angry.

Angry at women, like Debbie, who are trying to stop fathers seeing their children.

You see – Naomi’s plight is exacerbated by the controversial Shared Parenting Laws.

And whenever the media broaches this subject, it sparks gender warfare.

The children – who in one-in-five cases are the victims of sexual or physical assault – are forgotten.

Ten days ago, one of three reviews recommended major changes to the laws, brought in by the Howard Government.

They were alleged to be a factor in the tragic death of Darcey Freeman, who was thrown from the West Gate Bridge.

Her father is facing a murder charge.

The report, by retired Family Court judge Richard Chisholm, found that the so-called 50/50 parenting provisions were putting women and children at risk.

Attorney-General Robert McClelland said women had become reluctant to raise allegations of violence, because the court could now punish them with the entire bill for proceedings if the claims were not proven.

And it’s not just a financial risk.

Debbie fled interstate with her daughter after doctors found that her hymen had been breached and genitalia damaged following a weekend stay at her father’s house.

But the Federal Police forced her to return, or risk losing custody.

Now, every second weekend, Debbie leaves her six-year-old in the care of a man who rapes her.

This is one of hundreds of cases that the Attorney-General says are merely  “misunderstandings”.

The problem is that Men’s and Women’s Rights groups have turned this debate into a replica of ugly custody battles being fought out in Australian homes every day.

The men’s groups are well organised, with coordinated campaigns involving websites, talkback, blogs and letters to the editor.

They now plan to form a coalition to lobby the Senate and marginal electorates.

I can understand their anger.

My heart goes out to anyone who’s been wrenched from their beloved children.

But in cases where violence is alleged, surely the safety of those children comes first?

Yes, there are some women who make false claims. But these are in the minority.

Every allegation must be thoroughly investigated, without the children being exposed to further harm.

Now – that doesn’t mean we have to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

In a review by the Australian Institute of Family Studies, more than 70 percent of couples in shared parenting arrangements said it worked well.

The laws simply need to be amended.  Sadly, this is unlikely to happen in an election year.

As Adele Horin wrote in the Sydney Morning Herald, “The Rudd Government is unlikely to risk re-igniting the bitter shared-care debates of the Howard era by embarking on law reform, even if the task is to tidy up a sloppily worded act that has sown confusion, raised false expectations… and put some families at risk.”

Lawyers back this up: Around 62 percent of them believe the laws favour parents’ rights over children’s needs.

The National Council for Children Post-Separation is mobilizing thousands of people in marginal seats to withdraw support from the Labour Party, if it fails to act on the reviews’ recommendations.

As for the talkback response, it makes me wonder – what kind of a society do we live in, where the plight of a suicidal young girl is met with cries of “what about me”?

Tracey Spicer and Stuart Bocking are filling in hosting Mornings on 2UE.